不給碰通常是分手的徵兆 - 成人話題討論
By Damian
at 2017-05-16T01:39
at 2017-05-16T01:39
Table of Contents
用手機代po 如果歪掉請見諒
以下代po
==============
有誰比我慘
我從結婚到現在老婆都不給碰
摸她她會把我手拍掉、打掉
還被架過拐子
性行為更不用說了 婚後0次!!!
最早不給碰是說婆媳問題
結果搬出來還是不給碰
這時她說會痛 跟前男友就不會痛
帶去看婦產科
醫生說多做幾次 前戲長一點試試看
然後跟我們推薦一款潤滑
醫生說她有在用 好用
我不疑有它 想說終於可以做愛了 開心
回來立馬訂了四瓶
結果咧 放到過期只用過兩次 有夠浪費的
是說那不也爽到兩次了嗎
屁啦 兩次抹上去說熱熱刺刺的會痛
就跑了
之後忍太久問老婆
說醫生明明說要多做為什麼不做
她說會痛
好 那我們再去看別的醫生
這次看身心的醫生
醫生也是說前戲拉長點
結果她直接跟醫生把前戲定義成無限延長
不然沒fu 不做
說我要有主見 她穿漂亮衣服要誇她
要陪她逛街 不能潑她冷水 等等等
否則沒fu
反正她如果爽的話 就有機會跟我做愛
這就是前戲
前你媽啦 哪有整天都是前戲
那你窗戶打開外面的男男女女都是前戲
我不幹了 哪有和老婆做愛那麼累的
哪有人結婚後沒做過愛的
潤滑液放到過期就算了 保險套也過期了
想到就睡不著 連打手槍都懶了
因為只能打一輩子手槍太丟臉了
所以請人代貼 拜託不要回文
記者不準抄
--
以下代po
==============
有誰比我慘
我從結婚到現在老婆都不給碰
摸她她會把我手拍掉、打掉
還被架過拐子
性行為更不用說了 婚後0次!!!
最早不給碰是說婆媳問題
結果搬出來還是不給碰
這時她說會痛 跟前男友就不會痛
帶去看婦產科
醫生說多做幾次 前戲長一點試試看
然後跟我們推薦一款潤滑
醫生說她有在用 好用
我不疑有它 想說終於可以做愛了 開心
回來立馬訂了四瓶
結果咧 放到過期只用過兩次 有夠浪費的
是說那不也爽到兩次了嗎
屁啦 兩次抹上去說熱熱刺刺的會痛
就跑了
之後忍太久問老婆
說醫生明明說要多做為什麼不做
她說會痛
好 那我們再去看別的醫生
這次看身心的醫生
醫生也是說前戲拉長點
結果她直接跟醫生把前戲定義成無限延長
不然沒fu 不做
說我要有主見 她穿漂亮衣服要誇她
要陪她逛街 不能潑她冷水 等等等
否則沒fu
反正她如果爽的話 就有機會跟我做愛
這就是前戲
前你媽啦 哪有整天都是前戲
那你窗戶打開外面的男男女女都是前戲
我不幹了 哪有和老婆做愛那麼累的
哪有人結婚後沒做過愛的
潤滑液放到過期就算了 保險套也過期了
想到就睡不著 連打手槍都懶了
因為只能打一輩子手槍太丟臉了
所以請人代貼 拜託不要回文
記者不準抄
--
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