馴龍高手 - 成人話題討論

By George
at 2015-08-31T22:43
at 2015-08-31T22:43
Table of Contents
我是一名處男
在30歲生日那晚
我獨自一人去85度c買了蛋糕慶祝自己生日
吹熄蠟燭的那瞬間
我突然被傳送到了另一個世界
那是一個充滿著魔法的夢幻世界
到處都是超過30歲的處男
起初還真有些不習慣要跟這群噁心肥宅處男生活
相處兩年後發現這些處男還蠻好相處的
在這個社會裡
要回歸到原本的世界只有破處一途
要怎麼破處呢
這個世界裡一年只有一次的聯誼機會
可以跟隔壁棚的聖女世界聯誼
聽名字就知道那邊是個美麗又夢幻到處都是處女的世界
為了這天到來
我趕緊勤練才藝.對話.想表現出我優質的一面
目的就是破處
聯誼這天到了
我身穿巫袍打著領帶
緩緩的走進會場入口
深呼吸了一口氣
踏進會場裡
我感受到了
這畫面
好美
會場裡充斥著各種形形色色的...........
生物
男的肥、女的龍
會場飄逸著油滋滋的味道跟龍鱗的味道
這畫面比我前陣子看的侏羅紀還像侏儸紀呢
我默默的抽了號碼牌入坐
會場裡擺滿了多張長桌
而我這桌坐了四男四女
我仔細的探索對面的四位聖女們
看到她們四位就讓我想起中午吃的肉包子+貢丸
原來網路上說的是真的
「只要過了30歲還是處女,不是長的夠歪就是個性夠歪。」
而在我眼裡看來
她們個性歪不歪我是不知道啦,但長的真的夠歪
但我也沒什麼資格批判他人
因為我是個肥宅
為了打破寧靜的沉默
我決定先起個頭
"那個....我看我們就先從自我介紹開始好了"
"好喔好喔!!!"
"好提議"
"提議的先開始"
沒想到我的提議大家都接受了
我站起身來開始展現自我
"大家好,我叫currymvp,平常的興趣是上ptt發廢文。"
"噁心"
"難怪還是處男"
"沒品味"
"這人一定都看奶照打手槍"
嗚嗚嗚嗚嗚
對面的四位聖女們聽到我的自我介紹居然開始評論起來
還大聲到讓我聽到了
我真的好難過
居然被四隻體脂肪怪物批判
我含著眼淚坐下
換隔壁的大叔起身自我介紹
"大家好,我姓怪,名叫叔叔,今年60歲,興趣是做愛"
"挖好有品味喔"
"他做愛技術一定一流"
"成熟的男人我最愛了~~~"
"跟剛剛那個噁宅不一樣"
我說大叔阿
你明明還是處男怎麼興趣會是做愛勒
重點是你活到60歲還是處男
根本是大魔導士了吧
重點是還深得聖女們喜愛
我又獨自的滴下兩滴眼淚
我決定去洗手間整頓一下情緒
走到廁所一半衣袖突然被拉住
我轉身一看
"這....這不是美美嗎...??"
"Hi...好久不見了"
沒想到
我從國小開始暗戀的女神---美美
居然是聖女
美美明明就長得還不錯
怎麼會沒人要呢
畢竟在這個世界國小同學巧遇
更加有話聊、更有安全感
我跟美美便聊天聊到直接走出會場
到了這個年紀、這個世界
我了,妳也了
我們不透過更多的言語
而直接上了賓館
一進房間
忍了30幾年的小龜龜快爆發不住了
我拿起魔杖對著美美大喊
斷開鎖鍊
碰的一聲
美美的衣服褲子內褲全被我炸開了
我....等了30幾年......我終於看見了美美的裸體了....
美美也用她溫柔的雙手脫掉我身上所有衣物
我雙手直接上前抓住美美的雙峰
開始狂舔
美美的喘息聲讓我好硬好硬
我開始向下探索
一探不對
我好像聞到了一股濃濃的刺鼻味
我開始頭暈目眩想吐
難道美美身上持有著 +9 3倍腐臭的鮑魚盾牌嗎
沒想到我最心愛的人居然有這等神兵利器
難怪美美現在還是處女
原來是隻臭鮑鮑龍
我的屌直接軟掉
美美起身來關心我
美美:你怎麼了
我實在不好意思開口說她鮑魚很臭
便委婉的對著美美說
我:我覺得女生要好好愛護自己,第一次應該要給老公才對。
美美:可是我們剛剛情投意合不是嗎?
我:父母給妳的身體要好好愛護,不能隨便給我這種肥宅碰
我開始各種道德勸說
但美美根本聽不進去,很想要我騎她
我受不了了
我直接對著美美明講她鮑魚很臭
美美聽了倒是發飆了
拿起她的聖女劍向我劈過來
我也拿起我的魔杖準備對抗
這兩年魔法師不是當假的
我開始詠唱火球術,冰箭術,聖靈召喚
朝著美美攻擊
美美也提起她那很臭的鮑魚盾牌各種防禦
在房間裡
各種形形色色的法術轟炸全場
這畫面像極了勇者鬥惡龍
http://imgur.com/JpWbtpf
美美真的很強
我的攻擊對她起不了作用
看來我必須要施展我的最強法術了
我閉上眼
全神貫注
消耗我所有mp
開始詠唱我的最終法術
霹靂卡霹靂拉拉 波波利那貝貝魯多
一道光束直接打在美美的龍軀上
美美長嘆一聲
吼~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
便倒下
美美用著微弱的聲音對著我說
"你...你這樣欺負我這女人....你算什麼男人"
我一聽震驚
在我耳旁想起了一首歌
『你算什麼男人 算什麼男人
眼睜睜看 她走卻不聞不問
是有多天真 就別再硬撐』
我沒有不聞不問阿
我剛剛聞了直接軟屌
想硬撐還撐不起來
但我心裡還是存在著美美小時後美麗的模樣
我扶起美美
對著她說
"雖然我不能跟妳做愛,但我可以養妳"
美美也感動的流下淚水
就這樣
雖然我還不能回歸現實的社會
但我做了一個男人的決定
決定飼養美美
繼續在這個世界打拼
我跨坐上美美的身軀
套上龍鞍
駕馭著
展開一段全新的旅程
人人都稱我為
馴龍高手
--
Tags:
做愛
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