這種情況算是詐騙還是真的援交 - 成人話題討論

By Victoria
at 2010-11-10T17:46

Table of Contents

※ 引述《sexKinsey (西斯板匿名專用)》之銘言：
: 各位西斯大大好:
: 小弟在愛情公寓裡接到一個留言有MSN 希望做朋友諸如此類的

恕刪

: 2000 2個小時
: 我斷線了
: 大大諸公請判斷是真的還是假的是真的會不會太貴

最近不敢發文怕被老婆察覺，但是這篇文讓我忍不住了，這個『蒲公英與老大』的
邂逅故事，可能會有以下的結局：

【結局一】

兩人為了談價碼，互留電話，利用電話交談：

蒲公英：這位領導，鐘點情人都是要先收費先匯款喀。（大陸腔）

老大　：你怎麼腔調聽起來像大陸人？

（話筒依稀可聽見有人哭喊著『媽媽！！救我，快拿十萬來贖我～』）

蒲公英：哪有，我台灣人，身材很牛的，想快活要先匯款喀。（大陸腔）

老大　：為什麼要先匯款？不能面交嗎？

蒲公英：姐我住海口怎麼面交，啊…我是說我現在剛好在湖口，總之，咱行規就
　　　　是先收到匯款才能幹活。（大陸腔）

老大　：呃…那匯款帳號是多少？

蒲公英：0487-xxxx-xxxx

老大在匯完款，興致勃勃地到了約定地點準備挑戰極限乳牛（號稱），但是除了討
零錢坐車的怪叔叔外，他始終等不到那操著大陸口音的蒲公英，夜深了，陣陣寒風
吹來，只有老二還是孤拎拎地挺著……。

【結局二】

蒲公英與老大在某地見面了：

老大　：妳好，我是老大。

蒲公英：你好，你應該就是要找鐘點情人的老大吧。

老大　：對啊，哇…妳做援交還帶著手提電腦喔？

蒲公英：嗯，我只是想確認在網路交談的ＩＤ是不是你本人。

老大　：當然是囉，這ＩＤ就是我的啊。

蒲公英：那就好，我忘了跟你說，我真正的職業是什麼。

老大　：大學生？

蒲公英：不是，我是專門在網路上『釣魚』的，學長！！可以出來囉～

聽說派出所員警泡的老人茶喝起來特別的香，老大坐在警車後座，認真地思索著…
…。

【結局三】

蒲公英與老大相約在汽車旅館，對方在收錢後，開始寬衣解帶：

老大　：妳剛剛脫的運動上衣怎麼好像印著『ＸＸ國中』的字樣啊？

蒲公英：那是為了增加賣點啦，男人都愛吃幼齒咩。（乾笑）

老大　：妳這胸部怎麼好像比我還小啊？

蒲公英：發育不良咩，快點脫褲子吧～～。

說時遲那時快，房間門突然被打開，三個壯漢衝了進來，兩個壓住老大，一個拿著
相機拼命地拍照，蒲公英開始啜泣。

蒲公英：哥～他說要帶我來看『烏龜』，結果欺負我啦～～。

仙人哥：什麼！！我妹妹還不滿十六歲，你竟然就騙她來這裡！！

老大　：這這這…這都是誤會啦…哇…你手上那台大炮單眼不便宜喔。

仙人哥：廢話，這是我吃飯的工具……少囉唆，你要怎麼給我交待！！

老大　：我又沒有幹嘛…呃……啊啊…。（被揍）

仙人哥：你要是不拿出個五十萬替我妹遮羞，我就告死你！！

老大　：我真的什麼都沒有做啊～～～～～～。（回音）

幼齒雲裳羞褪下，迎頭仙人跳門煞，老大危殆，欲知後事，請待下回分曉。

【結局四】

蒲公英與老大相約在汽車旅館，對方在收錢後，開始寬衣解帶：

老大　：幹嘛背對著我脫衣服啊～害羞嗎？

蒲公英：嗯，而且我怕太刺激，你會受不了～。

老大　：轉過來讓我看一下吧。

對方『跪趴』在老大的面前。

蒲公英：　Or/甲\ 啊，我的私密處都給你看光光了。（嗲聲）

老大　：呃…這姿勢，應該看到的是 Or/ ¤\　才對啊……。

蒲公英：人家是男人身，女兒心啦，你叫我『阿雄』就可以了。（嬌羞）

老大　：阿雄…………。

蒲公英：鵝～～～鵝鵝鵝鵝鵝鵝鵝！！（不明真相的笑聲。）

接下來老大就再也想不起來後面發生了什麼事，只知道『阿雄』慢慢地用『甲』逼
近了他的小菊花，那晚，菊花成為了向日葵……。

以上純屬臆測，若有雷同，純屬巧合。

當然，以上都是誇張的案例，但是網路找援交這種事情，先不說合不合法，本來就
有很大的風險性，沒事就沒事，要是真的這麼倒楣碰上了仙人跳怎麼辦？有很多事
情越是認為可笑，就越容易成真。

我知道整天只能靠雙手磨蹭小老二，找不到洞鑽，對年輕男人來說是件很痛苦的事
情，男人一定要吃『海鮮』，不然就不能叫男人了，發洩性慾是天經地義的，只是
網路買賣都會有詐騙，這種要是也遇到，你是否能夠釋懷？

網路說自己168公分一體重50 見面變成150公分一體重68。
網路說自己相貌賽貂蟬　　　見面變成受驚人雷禪。

說了這麼多，如果真的做好心理準備面對可能的各種結果（當然也是可能皆大歡喜
），那麼不妨去親身體驗看看，反正感覺上，你的火也被點起來了，只能說『願打
願捱』，自己知道自己在幹嘛就好～。

至於兩小時2000會不會太貴……這我就不知道了。

好久沒發文，順便趁文末發些Ｐ幣，首推、11、33、66、99、100推各送2000Ｐ幣，
重複推、箭頭、噓，皆不計，『第一位幫忙計算哪些ＩＤ能拿Ｐ幣的熱心鄉民送
3000Ｐ幣（請原諒我算數很差），小小心意，請鄉民笑納～。

潛沉，是為了打更久遠的炮……。

--
老婆：這間的珍奶很難喝，你還敢買來喝喔....

我　：我都敢娶妳了，還有什麼不敢的

老婆：你給我過來！！

--

Tags: 成人

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at 2012-04-11T05:31

K大必推

By Poppy
at 2012-04-13T23:34

推！

By Brianna
at 2012-04-16T17:38

XDXDXD

By Charlie
at 2012-04-19T11:42

推!!!!

By Anonymous
at 2012-04-22T05:46

!!!!!!!!

By Anthony
at 2012-04-24T23:49

w推!

By Connor
at 2012-04-27T17:53

會是另一個天才小釣手嗎

By Hedy
at 2012-04-30T11:57

推

By Ivy
at 2012-05-03T06:01

推

By Caroline
at 2012-05-06T00:04

我也要P斃~~~~~~

By Puput
at 2012-05-08T18:08

原PO...算推的時候EXCEL很好用~

By Yuri
at 2012-05-11T12:12

K大必推

By Zora
at 2012-05-14T06:16

好久不見推!!!

By Zora
at 2012-05-17T00:19

推K大

By Rosalind
at 2012-05-19T18:23

推

By Hardy
at 2012-05-22T12:27

K神快拜!!

By Hedy
at 2012-05-25T06:31

推

By Elizabeth
at 2012-05-28T00:34

k大好久沒發文了,原來是關禁閉去了啊XDDD

By Jack
at 2012-05-30T18:38

By Rae
at 2012-06-02T12:42

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

By Jake
at 2012-06-05T06:46

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

By Jacky
at 2012-06-08T00:49

推~~~XD

By Hedwig
at 2012-06-10T18:53

推!!

By Regina
at 2012-06-13T12:57

推簽名檔!!

By Faithe
at 2012-06-16T07:01

k大未看先推

By Selena
at 2012-06-19T01:04

好好笑

By Emily
at 2012-06-21T19:08

k大很喜歡虧老婆呢一定很愛她

By Selena
at 2012-06-24T13:12

K神

By Quintina
at 2012-06-27T07:16

身高168體重50　見面變身高150體重68....XDDDD

By Bethany
at 2012-06-30T01:19

我看完笑死了

By Mia
at 2012-07-02T19:23

PUSH

By Suhail Hany
at 2012-07-05T13:27

K大~快拜

By Jessica
at 2012-07-08T07:31

竟然可以引k大出來po文

By Suhail Hany
at 2012-07-11T01:34

經驗豐富

By Ida
at 2012-07-13T19:38

K大就推了~

By Barb Cronin
at 2012-07-16T13:42

XDD

By Damian
at 2012-07-19T07:46

推

By Aaliyah
at 2012-07-22T01:49

ＸＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤＤ

By Belly
at 2012-07-24T19:53

2hr 2k算超便宜吧XD

By Rebecca
at 2012-07-27T13:57

推~

By Dinah
at 2012-07-30T08:01

按錯捕推

By Charlotte
at 2012-08-02T02:04

By Genevieve
at 2012-08-04T20:08

By Ophelia
at 2012-08-07T14:12

推推~~

By Thomas
at 2012-08-10T08:16

!!!

By Lucy
at 2012-08-13T02:19

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

By Rosalind
at 2012-08-15T20:23

唉唷!!!就樓上了!!!!

By Leila
at 2012-08-18T14:27

寫的真好

By Linda
at 2012-08-21T08:31

大推!!

By Hedda
at 2012-08-24T02:34

很好笑+1

By Annie
at 2012-08-26T20:38

K大必推

By Genevieve
at 2012-08-29T14:42

推推~ 快笑死了

By Emma
at 2012-09-01T08:46

推 XDDDD

By Mary
at 2012-09-04T02:49

K大!!!

By Genevieve
at 2012-09-06T20:53

推

By Mary
at 2012-09-09T14:57

推看看應該截止了吧XD

By Victoria
at 2012-09-12T09:01

推~~

By Jessica
at 2012-09-15T03:04

推

By George
at 2012-09-17T21:08

只有老二還是孤拎拎地挺著XD

By Edwina
at 2012-09-20T15:12

push

By Quanna
at 2012-09-23T09:16

大推~

By Kumar
at 2012-09-26T03:19

笑~

By Donna
at 2012-09-28T21:23

k大就推....

By Hedda
at 2012-10-01T15:27

推推推

By Tom
at 2012-10-04T09:31

現在推好像太晚了?

By Tracy
at 2012-10-07T03:34

推!!!Y

By Tracy
at 2012-10-09T21:38

女:我不歡講話男:那見面好嗎? 見面講話後女生是大舌頭

By Franklin
at 2012-10-12T15:42

K大哎.. 不過你的四個選擇都挺慘的

By Regina
at 2012-10-15T09:46

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By Erin
at 2012-10-18T03:49

幹麼弄這麼好笑…

By Connor
at 2012-10-20T21:53

哈哈~好久不見的K大!

By Connor
at 2012-10-23T15:57

爆了還是推XDDD

By Anthony
at 2012-10-26T10:01

有笑有推

By Victoria
at 2012-10-29T04:04

推~

By Poppy
at 2012-10-31T22:08

k大必推~

By Ophelia
at 2012-11-03T16:12

囧rz

By Cara
at 2012-11-06T10:16

哈哈搶不到百推!K大發文依然好笑~喜歡結局一的大陸腔XDD

By Dora
at 2012-11-09T04:19

good

By Poppy
at 2012-11-11T22:23

幫推 XDD

By Doris
at 2012-11-14T16:27

不推不行

By Audriana
at 2012-11-17T10:31

首推cdern 11cdern 33cdern 66cdern 99cdern 100推cdern

By Ursula
at 2012-11-20T04:34

K大必推

By Madame
at 2012-11-22T22:38

K 推倒 XDD

By Jacob
at 2012-11-25T16:42

這實在是滿好笑的XDD

By Quintina
at 2012-11-28T10:46

都敢娶妳了，還有什麼不敢的

By Rachel
at 2012-12-01T04:49

還有得推嗎 ?

By Edward Lewis
at 2012-12-03T22:53

推好玩，加減推~

By Quintina
at 2012-12-06T16:57

不推爆對不起自己

By Tristan Cohan
at 2012-12-09T11:01

推k大好久不見

By James
at 2012-12-12T05:04

推推推

By Daniel
at 2012-12-14T23:08

By Donna
at 2012-12-17T17:12

許久不見的K大XDDDD

By Charlie
at 2012-12-20T11:16

幹之前遇到就是結局1 幹你娘還好沒附錢

By Quintina
at 2012-12-23T05:19

怪怪的怕老婆看到又希望大家把文推爆人頭算完幫低調好了

By Mason
at 2012-12-25T23:23

我想讓他爆

By Mia
at 2012-12-28T17:27

推推推

By Franklin
at 2012-12-31T11:31

我要錢

By Sierra Rose
at 2013-01-03T05:34

推

By Edith
at 2013-01-05T23:38

這大哥是說18021篇的那個嗎XDDD?

By Linda
at 2013-01-08T17:42

好久不見K大，還以為你最近有小小K或是迷你K所以比較忙 XD

By Caroline
at 2013-01-11T11:46

推~~~~Y

By Andy
at 2013-01-14T05:49

K大發文必推

By Bennie
at 2013-01-16T23:53

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

By Olivia
at 2013-01-19T17:57

推~~~~不過真的很好笑耶！

By Yedda
at 2013-01-22T12:01

媽阿我笑翻了XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

By Dora
at 2013-01-25T06:04

K大必推的啊!!!!

By Christine
at 2013-01-28T00:08

要玩我寧願去五木影陪挑個正妹在匡出場雖然要7k 但只要

By Kumar
at 2013-01-30T18:12

臉皮夠後多打幾次槍要挑到model等級的不是什麼問題~

By Lily
at 2013-02-02T12:16

K大必推XDDDDDDDD

By Kama
at 2013-02-05T06:19

GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By Erin
at 2013-02-08T00:23

By George
at 2013-02-10T18:27

By Mason
at 2013-02-13T12:31

Or/甲\ 太好笑了XDD

By Kama
at 2013-02-16T06:34

推~太讚了

By Anonymous
at 2013-02-19T00:38

懷疑K大根本有找過蒲公英!!!!!

By Victoria
at 2013-02-21T18:42

K大無敵

By Victoria
at 2013-02-24T12:46

把拔玩魔獸把拔玩魔獸把拔玩魔獸把拔玩魔獸把拔玩魔獸

By Blanche
at 2013-02-27T06:49

拔拔在草妳馬

By Tom
at 2013-03-02T00:53

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

By Heather
at 2013-03-04T18:57

好久不見K大文了

By Candice
at 2013-03-07T13:01

XDDDDDDD

By Ethan
at 2013-03-10T07:04

有笑有推

By Erin
at 2013-03-13T01:08

K大推呀

By Quintina
at 2013-03-15T19:12

推

By Puput
at 2013-03-18T13:16

了無新意

By Erin
at 2013-03-21T07:19

推一個

By James
at 2013-03-24T01:23

K大好久沒發文了~

By Connor
at 2013-03-26T19:27

有笑有推~

By Emma
at 2013-03-29T13:31

好久不見

By Caroline
at 2013-04-01T07:34

K大必推

By Skylar DavisLinda
at 2013-04-04T01:38

推K大 Sadan要不要PO篇文章來讓大家看看? 少嘴砲

By Charlotte
at 2013-04-06T19:42

有人愛噓又愛看傲嬌

By Margaret
at 2013-04-09T13:46

Or/甲\ ← 看到這個我大笑ㄟXDDDDD

By Thomas
at 2013-04-12T07:49

這篇比閨房趣事好笑多了啦..給推!!

By Joseph
at 2013-04-15T01:53

k大～～必推

By Elizabeth
at 2013-04-17T19:57

有笑有推

By Edith
at 2013-04-20T14:01

推

By Dorothy
at 2013-04-23T08:04

推 XD 雷禪 XD

By Jacky
at 2013-04-26T02:08

好好笑!!!

By Elizabeth
at 2013-04-28T20:12

K大，你不寫文後，小弟覺得了無生趣了啊

By Carolina Franco
at 2013-05-01T14:16

有笑有推

By Brianna
at 2013-05-04T08:19

幼齒雲裳羞褪下，迎頭仙人跳門煞推~

By Selena
at 2013-05-07T02:23

終於發文…推一下

By Madame
at 2013-05-09T20:27

K大好久不見，幽默依然不減~

By John
at 2013-05-12T14:31

太好笑了

By Madame
at 2013-05-15T08:34

K大超強的啊

By Rosalind
at 2013-05-18T02:38

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

By Quintina
at 2013-05-20T20:42

K大發文必屬極品

By Carol
at 2013-05-23T14:46

西斯版第一推就給K大了

By Daniel
at 2013-05-26T08:49

好久沒看到K大了推推

By Michael
at 2013-05-29T02:53

純推 P幣就免了

By Elma
at 2013-05-31T20:57

好久不見K大發文了!!!

By Bennie
at 2013-06-03T15:01

推K大偷PO文

By Harry
at 2013-06-06T09:04

K大好文

By Kelly
at 2013-06-09T03:08

很不專業啊....真正會發生都不是上面寫的那些

By Lauren
at 2013-06-11T21:12

推推推

By Robert
at 2013-06-14T15:16

推

By Tom
at 2013-06-17T09:19

XDDD

By Adele
at 2013-06-20T03:23

推!

By Kelly
at 2013-06-22T21:27

媽媽！！救我，快拿十萬來贖我～

By Barb Cronin
at 2013-06-25T15:31

我覺得這篇比k大角色扮演的都好笑

By Franklin
at 2013-06-28T09:34

Or/甲\ XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

By Suhail Hany
at 2013-07-01T03:38

簽名黨也不錯笑XD

By Gary
at 2013-07-03T21:42

K大多po一些啦~~~

By Oliver
at 2013-07-06T15:46

你給我過來!

By Dinah
at 2013-07-09T09:49

你給我過來~~~~

By Susan
at 2013-07-12T03:53

好耶~!

By Isla
at 2013-07-14T21:57

真認真XD

By Ethan
at 2013-07-17T16:01

k大就是專業

By Jake
at 2013-07-20T10:04

這篇有好笑尤其是甲甲那段

By Oliver
at 2013-07-23T04:08

XDDD

這種情況算是詐騙還是真的援交 - 成人話題討論

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