看奶圖學修辭 - 成人話題討論

By Charlie
at 2016-01-06T00:33
at 2016-01-06T00:33
Table of Contents
原文恕刪。
期末考壓力大,小妹看了寶貝貓的大作忍不住手癢來亂寫一下。
歡迎高中小鮮肉們多多參照,考進 112 再秒讀秒退抵制台大(誤
譬喻、擬人、摹寫合用,作文拿高分就是小 case。
「那是一個充滿燥熱悸動與汗臭的夏天,
我和初戀女友莫名其妙的大吵小吵消磨了十年長跑感情,
曾經她胸前也有一條緊緊貼合的溝線,
但就像我們再也回不去那淌著蜜的時光,
如今她胸前的微笑亦不復見,
只剩嘴唇緊抿般拉長下垂的嘴角,背對背,漸行漸遠。」
映襯、轉化之餘順便引用一下古文,讓老師知道你上課很認真。
「我坐在捷運車廂上低頭與柳宗元共品西山之壯美,
忽然間,一陣香氣輕巧襲來,
我的雙眼不禁順著那道暗香繚繞、曲折幽迴的小徑,找上一雙琵琶猶抱的美乳,
白嫩晶瑩的肌膚上泛有青春的粉色,讓我定定地望著幾乎要失了魂,
然而,當我終於回神,視線上移,定焦在她臉上時,
猛然我心一震,方才堆疊成山的傾慕瞬時崩塌,一切美好嚮往灰飛煙滅。」
回文法創意文采兼具,老師會記得你(尤其如果他剛好是 9.2)。
「我愛 my angel,久硬馬愛我。」
補個西斯點
我笑點超低又喜歡胡言亂語,
有次跟砲友在床上做著做著我突然轉頭看窗外的天空,
他跟著轉頭,但當然除了藍天白雲之外什麼都沒看到。
我說,我在看天上會不會有一隻豬在飛。
然後我笑。
他邊動作,邊問我為什麼笑,
我說,「因為天空是藍色的呀。」
他表情不解。
我繼續說「因為你的車是藍色的,死掉的魚是藍色的、日文課本也是藍色的喔。」
這是類疊。
另外,如果作文要拿高分,用排比開頭是不錯的做法,
那種氣勢的差異,大概就像一次戰一個男生,跟一次戰三個男生的差別吧(?)。
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