昨天手天使的新聞 - 成人話題討論

By Emma
at 2017-10-03T01:20
at 2017-10-03T01:20
Table of Contents
看到昨天手天使的新聞,有些感受想說。
自己也是做影像工作,我肯定媒體願意去報導一些小人物的故事,但「我要大奶妹」這樣的標題,只是讓正軌的方向走得更艱難,讓更多民眾誤解這工作,或這些朋友的心情而已。
也許有的版友,身邊沒有認識身障的朋友,我說說幾個,我工作中拍攝過或認識的人們的故事好了,以下代號跟經歷皆為保護當事人修改過。
A是一個盲人,他的年紀跟我差沒多少,在他有份很好的工作,跟有個可愛的女友時,發生了場車禍,被酒駕的車輛攬腰撞上,從此他的世界就變了樣。
他傷到了腦,失明,容易短暫失憶;他的女友離開了他,他的工作沒了,他的爸爸因為傷心過度而去世,現在的他是老媽媽在照顧著他,隨著時間的復原跟細心的照料,他開始慢慢恢復。
記得拍攝幾次開始熟悉過後,他偷偷問了我一個問題。
「你有採訪過其他的身障者嗎?」
「有啊,怎麼了?」
「我有一個只能問男生的問題。」
隨著他靦腆的傻笑,我大概有點猜到他想問的事。
他也許記得位置,記得動作,但他沒有視覺,記憶殘破片段;而被照顧者的環境是被很多人忽略的,異性的家人,異性或語音不通的看護,沒有公部門專業,協助設計的居家生活環境(我當下想提供他番號用聽的都沒辦法,電腦在客廳,鍵盤是舊式的),或傳統的家庭或鄰里思維,我就不說台灣對弱勢的社福做得有多差勁了,連生活都協助不了,更別談身心靈層面了。
B是我在香港時,採訪的一個故事。童年因為父親的家暴傷害,讓他脊椎重創,只剩下頸部各45度的轉動,跟右手兩支手指的知覺。好險媽媽很爭氣,香港的社福機構也完善,至少現在的照顧是好的。
他最快樂的時間便是用手指操作滑鼠打線上遊戲,跟公會裡的妹妹們聊天,他說只有在那當下,他才像個男人。
有時很多民間團體會去關懷他,但多是天主基督佛教這類的宗教團體,他說有次在抒發「性」這方面的苦惱時,在當下竟然被斥責了。
他說:「我永遠記得從那次之後,旁人的眼光讓我不再想提這方面的事情。」
C是個港都的孩子,壯碩的身材黝黑的皮膚,有爽朗的個性,他高中時是班上的孩子王,反逆反骨挑戰權威,許多同校的女孩子都是他的愛慕者。看起來很壞但他很孝順,暑假幫單親爸爸去工地打工的他,摔斷了他的下半生,他才正值血氣方剛的17歲。
受傷的不只他的身體,也包含了他在同輩異性面前的自尊,就像是他因缺乏運動,日漸痿縮的雙腳一般。
那時我是拍他的同學,一個善良的女孩子,每每外地求學放假返鄉,她都會帶點好吃的來看他,陪他說話。
他說:「她就像我的天使一般,讓我頑劣躁動又被束縛的靈魂,得以平靜。」
D是氣爆的傷者,他的四肢只剩一隻手是完整的,其他三肢不是全截裝義肢,就是半截裝義肢,完整的那隻手五支手指也因燒傷而沾黏,裝著全身的壓力衣努力復健。幸運的是,他有個不離不棄的女朋友。
她笑說:「以前那些親暱的舉動,現在也只能好好忍耐了。至於要怎麼做,大概也沒人可以教我們吧。」
E是個先天性小兒麻痺的美麗女孩,也許是先天的習慣,讓她並沒有那樣地自怨自艾,她一個人依靠輪椅的生活過得很好,事業也很成功,唯一讓她挫折的,只有感情,很多男人也許欣賞她的人,但接受不了她的身體,很多男人欣賞她的人,也接受得了她的身體,但接受不了往後的生活。
她有個固定,職業級需要收費的陪伴,長久下來,他就像是她另一個重要的存在,圓滿了她缺的那塊。
她笑說:「我還真擔心以後他不做,我該怎麼辦。」
我也記得我之前跟一個女孩做愛時,她的一切都很美好,白皙光滑的皮膚,勻稱的身材,可愛的臉蛋,主動又溫柔的對待我,但她因為車禍右腳掌被削掉了一大塊,那是我唯二兩次,也是第一次跟身障者做愛,比我想像中的來得困難,因為你必須顧慮她的行動跟姿態跟想法。
我記得她說,如果你害怕,我可以穿上襪子,我褪下去親吻她早已癒合的傷口,看着她與她對望,我不知道她的眼神裡想說什麼話。
其他的FGHIJK種種的故事,我就不說了。
不管是生理上的解脫還是心理上的解脫,這些性義工又或是少部份的性工作者(大部份的性工作者也是無法接受的),不管是為工作為同情為人道理念種種,他(她)們都該受到尊重的,因為這不並只是輕鬆靠肉體的工作。
因為轉換過來,大家都明白,也許每次短暫的對話與互動,都是這些身障者們,壓抑許久,無從訴說,一生一次的陪伴。
而他們的人生,已經受到太多不公平的對待與敵視了。
其實還是希望更多人用正面的態度,去關懷這些身障朋友,也認真看待這些性義工的付出。
謝謝。
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Sent from JPTT on my Samsung SM-G610Y.
--
Tags:
做愛
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