所謂的搭訕 - 成人話題討論

By Sandy
at 2017-10-05T00:43
at 2017-10-05T00:43
Table of Contents
從不小心推個文到不小心發了一篇廢文,訊息跟站內信即使到現在還是有事沒事出現,說
煩也還好,但是看了就覺得:這也難怪……(?
我沒有要教學,只是把遇到看了會想翻白眼的例子舉出來。
======================
例一
對方:hi
我:……
對方:咦
我:?
對方:無聊,聊聊
我:好啊,請說
對方:好難開頭
結語:甘我屁事。
例二
對方:下班下班
我:???
對方:累累
我:……(累你妹你哪位)
對方:QQ
我:……
結語:甘我屁事。
例三:
對方:hi
我:?
對方:你在西斯版也收很多信嗎
我:yes
對方:所以你常被約?
我:yes
對方:人正真好
結語:一直問人家問題我也好心回答你,這樣應該知道我很善良了吧。
例四
對方:嗨嗨
我:?
對方:嗨嗨嗨嗨
結語:無從吐槽。
==================
上面的只是開場白,但基於做善事還是會禮貌敷衍
例一
對方:中秋節快樂~
我:中秋節快樂。
對方:不過我還在上班,也沒有烤肉
我:哦
對方:吃飽了
結語:原來我句點沒用,你可以自己句點,是我不識抬舉。
例二:
對方:你多久沒打炮了
我:可能不到24小時吧
對方:齁昨天才約過啊
在ptt還是別的約的?
舒服嗎?
那你昨天做幾次?
(隔天)
對方:哈囉
結語:你問的太多了
例三
對方:早餐吃了嗎
我:沒有
對方:怎麼還沒吃
我:不餓
對方:早餐很重要一定要吃啊
我:我知道
對方:我還躺在床上賴床,好懶得買哦
我:你吃雞排吧
對方:我沒推到文你可以分我吃嗎
我:不要
對方:我可以幫你分擔油脂啊
我:我再運動就好ㄎㄎ
對方:你都做什麼運動
我:幹嘛跟你講
對方:說說嘛
我:我又不知道你是誰你要幹嘛
對方:喔喔哦
沒有幹嘛啦
就只是剛起床而已
問問你喜歡什麼運動嘛
我:哦,打炮啊
對方:呃……都你在動哦
我:對,運動減肥
偶爾,還是會想當死魚
但是都沒遇到技術好的
對方:哈哈
我都遇不到
我:你回家多練練吧
對方:怎麼練
我:丟球玩都看不懂,回去多練練
對方:我接我接
今天騎車好累
車子好多
洗完澡了你在幹嘛
我:你可以拿一本空白筆記本,自己寫日記
這個主意不錯,不用謝了
結語:原來這就是不偏不倚華麗地閃避嗎wwwww
=====================
來我們劃個重點:
啊,算了,好累哦
人家是女森耶,人家才不想開話題,你們自己加油。
西斯點:
男森最喜歡我用手幫忙尻尻了,每次都要我用長繭的手尻雞雞,可是有次繭破掉刺刺的,
不小心就尻破皮了。
--
煩也還好,但是看了就覺得:這也難怪……(?
我沒有要教學,只是把遇到看了會想翻白眼的例子舉出來。
======================
例一
對方:hi
我:……
對方:咦
我:?
對方:無聊,聊聊
我:好啊,請說
對方:好難開頭
結語:甘我屁事。
例二
對方:下班下班
我:???
對方:累累
我:……(累你妹你哪位)
對方:QQ
我:……
結語:甘我屁事。
例三:
對方:hi
我:?
對方:你在西斯版也收很多信嗎
我:yes
對方:所以你常被約?
我:yes
對方:人正真好
結語:一直問人家問題我也好心回答你,這樣應該知道我很善良了吧。
例四
對方:嗨嗨
我:?
對方:嗨嗨嗨嗨
結語:無從吐槽。
==================
上面的只是開場白,但基於做善事還是會禮貌敷衍
例一
對方:中秋節快樂~
我:中秋節快樂。
對方:不過我還在上班,也沒有烤肉
我:哦
對方:吃飽了
結語:原來我句點沒用,你可以自己句點,是我不識抬舉。
例二:
對方:你多久沒打炮了
我:可能不到24小時吧
對方:齁昨天才約過啊
在ptt還是別的約的?
舒服嗎?
那你昨天做幾次?
(隔天)
對方:哈囉
結語:你問的太多了
例三
對方:早餐吃了嗎
我:沒有
對方:怎麼還沒吃
我:不餓
對方:早餐很重要一定要吃啊
我:我知道
對方:我還躺在床上賴床,好懶得買哦
我:你吃雞排吧
對方:我沒推到文你可以分我吃嗎
我:不要
對方:我可以幫你分擔油脂啊
我:我再運動就好ㄎㄎ
對方:你都做什麼運動
我:幹嘛跟你講
對方:說說嘛
我:我又不知道你是誰你要幹嘛
對方:喔喔哦
沒有幹嘛啦
就只是剛起床而已
問問你喜歡什麼運動嘛
我:哦,打炮啊
對方:呃……都你在動哦
我:對,運動減肥
偶爾,還是會想當死魚
但是都沒遇到技術好的
對方:哈哈
我都遇不到
我:你回家多練練吧
對方:怎麼練
我:丟球玩都看不懂,回去多練練
對方:我接我接
今天騎車好累
車子好多
洗完澡了你在幹嘛
我:你可以拿一本空白筆記本,自己寫日記
這個主意不錯,不用謝了
結語:原來這就是不偏不倚華麗地閃避嗎wwwww
=====================
來我們劃個重點:
啊,算了,好累哦
人家是女森耶,人家才不想開話題,你們自己加油。
西斯點:
男森最喜歡我用手幫忙尻尻了,每次都要我用長繭的手尻雞雞,可是有次繭破掉刺刺的,
不小心就尻破皮了。
--
Tags:
成人
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