如何搞上第4次見面的女生!? - 成人話題討論

By Zora
at 2006-12-26T16:16
at 2006-12-26T16:16
Table of Contents
善哉!這真是一篇了不起的見解,所謂經典,正是如此。
真強者謹補充部分意見如下。
※ 引述《shiningwing (熱血笨蛋飛小羽)》之銘言:
: ==========不打嘴炮認真文==========
: 一言以蔽之就是:
: 「要面不改色說著一堆你自己都不相信的蠢話和謊話。」
: 只要你可以做到這點,甚至你的精神可以像奇樂那樣到達神的領域,說著
: 一堆蠢到爆的花言巧語和你自己都覺得在虎爛的甜言蜜語,而完完全全眉
: 毛不動,臉色不改,不會笑場,簡單的說你必須要在短短四次見面裡面的
: 沒多少印象中,把自己催眠到只愛這個女人,沒她你會死,你想疼死她,
: (可是實際上你只想睡她)自然就成功率大增。
嗯,所謂甜言蜜語,尚可分為以下數種。
一、大體而言,追求者眾多的標準型正妹,並不稀罕你稱讚她美,也不怎麼買帳你為她神
魂顛倒。
那麼,你應該怎麼做呢?
大原則是『與其多用嘴巴說話,不如多用眼神或表情說話』。
盡可能讓自己誠懇老實但有趣且不笨,好想疼她對她好卻不知道該怎麼辦。
(但請注意,千萬不要讓她以為你是童子雞,千萬不要!切記!)
外觀上,你必須:除了跟她有關的事情外,你學養豐富、能言善道、簡直就是一流的
青年才俊。
唯獨面對她,你藏不住眼神裡的不安、惶恐與緊張(其實你一點都不緊張,因為,
你乃即將成為半獸人的畜生)
你必須對她侃侃而談,幽默不做作(千萬別在這種類型的女生面前耍帥,她們見多了
,你硬要耍帥,還不如回家打手槍,看著自己的老二說:帥吧?)
但每當跟她眼神交會的時候,十次裡面,要有約三到四次,裝出不敢直視她的眼睛的
樣子。(切記,是不敢,而非不想。如果你不直視卻轉而看別的正妹,那叫做白痴)
你必須讓她發現,你偷偷看著她,有一點看痴了,但她一回頭,你馬上有點狼狽的顧
左右而言它,讓她以為她發現了你的窘樣。
其實你是『畜生用餐前之鱷魚的眼淚』
千萬別聊太嚴肅且令她消失性趣的話題,比方說,不可聊:"妳跟妳的前男友如何才
能復合"這類的噴飯話題(如果你非得這麼做,真強者建議你:武林稱雄,引刀自宮)
你應該稱讚她,但記得多稱讚這種女生一些『抽象的東西』。
稱讚美貌?佔一點時間即可,省下的時間,不如稱讚她的品味與風格。
稱讚皮膚?佔一點時間即可,省下的時間,不如稱讚絕頂聰明與優秀能力。
稱讚可愛?佔一點時間即可,省下的時間,不如展現自己的能力及與眾不同。
講一些你好喜歡她這類的話?不如有意無意的感謝神奇的造化讓你們有今天的見面。
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
畜生無涯回頭是岸的分隔線畜生無涯回頭是岸的分隔線畜生無涯回頭是岸的分隔線
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
根據強者秘笈指出,標準型正妹,大約有六成是"公主女王症狀群”。
自以為是公主或女王的女人,最喜歡享受一流獵物因為自己而誠惶誠恐的成就感。
你必須投其所好。
如果你對這類型的女生自以為屌、一昧地耍花言巧語,
那麼,你想成功,近乎於:看著山水畫、意欲打手槍。一樣的困難啊......
什麼?你問真強者:"如何迅速判斷對方是否自以為自己是公主或女王?"
孩子,很簡單,一共有九種方法,茲先行傳授其中一種→→貓類觀察法:
1.凡是暱稱或習性喜歡稱自己叫"貓"或"喵"的,有八成乃公主女王症候群。
2.凡聲稱自己就是特別喜歡貓類的高貴、愛理人不理人的屌樣、覺得貓就是女人的
象徵、貓好像女人喔我好喜歡。這種女生,有九成乃公主女王症候群。
3.但請注意,這邊講的是真貓,如果她喜歡的是凱蒂貓這一類卡通人物,或是喜歡
使用一些貓圖騰的衣物飾品,就不足以斷定她是否乃公主女王症候群的一員,必
須從其他地方判斷。
再者,如果她愛貓,但不是因為貓的屌樣而愛貓(比方說她愛貓是因為貓像極了
沒三小路用的獅子老虎.....這類的原因),那麼你就不能斷定她是公主女王症
候群。
簽約時間到了,為了維繫強者殿堂所需之開銷,必須暫時停筆。
未盡之部分,容後專文再予分析。
朔風野大,阿強歸矣,猶屢屢回頭望汝也。
真強者敬上
--
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正妹
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