夜店真的是可以撿的到屍體 - 成人話題討論

By Rebecca
at 2011-12-23T12:21

Table of Contents

終於有時間來回這篇文章

在夜店浪跡那麼多年

我先來回應標題

答案是:可以

而且是每個禮拜三四五六日都在發生

我上一篇發文有說到如何製造屍體

這篇要談論如何處理屍體

如果你已經閃過最後一道友情防線

突破大門

運上車計程車或私用車都行

盡量不要兩輪因為被風吹很容易吐很快就醒來

在製造屍體的過程

聊天時就可以先問家庭狀況

一個人來讀書?自住嗎?有室友嗎? 之類的

當然要不著痕跡的問不可以霹靂啪啦問這方面的

通常有室友的有6~7成的機率會一起去玩

如果沒有像強者我朋友猛哥那般帥

19歲就達成夜店雙成就室友丼+破處

就別輕易把上有室友的

或者最好找尋同伴處理室友

記得能不要最好不要帶到自家

後患無窮

最好的場地還是摩鐵

雖然貴了點但起碼安全無虞

推砲率大增

到了她家首先最重要的

觀察環境以及

"看有沒有人跟車"

身邊已經非常多遇過仙人跳不可不防

進去房間謹遵三不一沒有

一.不開燈

有些人會有習慣性動作

所以第一件事

就是阻止她有一回房就開燈的習慣

黑暗具有神祕的能量

開燈往往見光死

這也是為什麼夜店沒開燈前大家都是正妹的原因

怕發現真面目後她會迅速退酒你會瞬間軟屌

保障自己也保障她人

二. 不盥洗

滿身酒味女人會ㄋㄞ說讓我先洗個澡

畢竟已經到了她的力場範圍

再上床前都希望香香的獻祭給男性

順便檢查一下內衣有沒有太俗跟內褲是不是一套

腋毛腿毛有沒有刮妝有沒有花

這時候別忘了習慣這兩個字

很多女人在洗澡時會"順便"做一個動作

對

就是卸妝

當她喝茫了之後到浴室又是另一個模式

在她洗澡時可能已經遺忘在她床上有個男人在努力把自己弄硬

就這樣默默的洗了臉卸了妝醒了酒

出浴室門看到一個男的全裸躺在她床上

她洗完臉醒了

你看到她素顏軟了

悲劇

三.不口交

誠如主文所講

悲劇往往發生在口交時

其實不只是因為30CM會頂到她喉嚨

造成嘔吐

還有兩個很重要原因

第一有些人不像鄉民有30CM

當女人可以掌握你的屌的時候

她會開始比較判斷長度和硬度

這根屌有沒有資格進老娘的穴

就在那近距離的評估下

眼神越發不削套弄也顯得疲累

但是也不好意思送客

只好叫你速速解決速速離開

第二

一夜的夜店跳舞喝酒

再掏出伏魔肉棒時

你可能已經忘了它早已被汗垢覆蓋

甚至有壹些刺鼻的味道

不要說被頂到喉嚨

光要開始口交聞到就直接吐了

又是個悲劇

一沒有就是

沒有時間給你浪費

ONS就是要快狠準

尤其是處於酒醉狀態下的祭品

更要避免一件我上頭不斷重複的事情讓她醒酒

這是大忌

因為茫的時候看你是唐伯虎

醒了你不過是9527

快快辦事

拍個事後照

來根事後煙

哄她睡著

閃人

成就GET

不用刻意的留聯絡方式頂多給他無名或FB

如果她醒了看了你照片

或是下次又再夜店見面

還是肯理你密你敲你跟你敬酒

表示她覺得你還是個人樣

就可以把她開發成專職砲友

如果就這樣失去音訊

那就偶爾翻翻照片

動動左手回憶起那夜美好時光吧

祝大家推砲順利

--

Tags: 正妹

All Comments

By Ula
at 2011-12-27T11:47

第一次看屍體在忠孝東路＿＿KTV門口服務生把屍體扛出來

By Oscar
at 2011-12-31T11:13

就射了

By David
at 2012-01-04T10:38

算是有講到重點啦給推

By David
at 2012-01-08T10:04

又射了

By Oscar
at 2012-01-12T09:30

專業推

By Elma
at 2012-01-16T08:56

不盥洗的話不是會有鮑魚味跟香腸味???這樣可嗎?

By Carolina Franco
at 2012-01-20T08:22

聞不太出來的，因為酒味已經蓋過去了；若聞出來的話乾脆烙跑

By Noah
at 2012-01-24T07:48

悲劇

By Ina
at 2012-01-28T07:14

我開始相信你了

By Quintina
at 2012-02-01T06:40

三不一沒有

By Hedda
at 2012-02-05T06:06

有推有看

By Robert
at 2012-02-09T05:32

靠,整個超專業的...果然經驗豐富

By Ina
at 2012-02-13T04:57

好笑

By Annie
at 2012-02-17T04:23

推杯具

By Necoo
at 2012-02-21T03:49

沒洗過澡就要辦事我覺得超噁心的.....

By Necoo
at 2012-02-25T03:15

原PO鮪魚哥，專撿鮪魚

By Rae
at 2012-02-29T02:41

酒臭味做起來不會很噁嗎?

By Rosalind
at 2012-03-04T02:07

By Rachel
at 2012-03-08T01:33

悲劇XD

By Rosalind
at 2012-03-12T00:59

所以你是撿骨師?

By Ivy
at 2012-03-16T00:25

專業

By Thomas
at 2012-03-19T23:51

撿骨值得信賴

By Hamiltion
at 2012-03-23T23:16

專業！

By Iris
at 2012-03-27T22:42

9527~~~還不快過來!

By Sandy
at 2012-03-31T22:08

專業食屍鬼

By Rosalind
at 2012-04-04T21:34

這也太專業了吧

By Edward Lewis
at 2012-04-08T21:00

讚!!!

By William
at 2012-04-12T20:26

專業文推

By Charlie
at 2012-04-16T19:52

好專業!! 晚輩受教了<(_ _)>

By Edwina
at 2012-04-20T19:18

這感覺不像撿屍體是戰術
撿屍體是指別人在廁所弄完之後女生依然不省人事

By Agatha
at 2012-04-24T18:44

說真的, 會的人不用看這篇也會, 不會的看人看了也不會

By Edward Lewis
at 2012-04-28T18:10

後來的人再上去補刀背刺

By Christine
at 2012-05-02T17:35

好可怕><

By Carol
at 2012-05-06T17:01

專業教戰守則

By Ingrid
at 2012-05-10T16:27

真是的，要不是吃素有酒戒，我早就可去以當屍體了
誰撿到我誰倒楣

By Lauren
at 2012-05-14T15:53

酒是植物釀的為什麼吃素不可以吃呢XD

By Liam
at 2012-05-18T15:19

影響心性的不能薑蒜也不可以

By Michael
at 2012-05-22T14:45

裝屍體就好了啊

By Odelette
at 2012-05-26T14:11

韭菜也不行 (壯陽?

By Oliver
at 2012-05-30T13:37

味道重的也不行

By Thomas
at 2012-06-03T13:03

我比較想聽猛哥的故事

By Robert
at 2012-06-07T12:29

真男人！！

By Quintina
at 2012-06-11T11:54

厲害

By Belly
at 2012-06-15T11:20

有看有推

By Caroline
at 2012-06-19T10:46

怕壯陽食物的根本不該上sex板

By Brianna
at 2012-06-23T10:12

有笑有推

By Enid
at 2012-06-27T09:38

看這篇推文我還以為進錯版XD

By Jacky
at 2012-07-01T09:04

還拍個事後照XDDDD

By Bennie
at 2012-07-05T08:30

受用一生

By Belly
at 2012-07-09T07:56

哈哈哈我知道現在夜店不太給玩廁所了

By Yedda
at 2012-07-13T07:22

只是重申一下當初"撿屍體"的意思

By Edith
at 2012-07-17T06:48

專業撿屍體高手只是都不開個小燈檢查一下鮑魚嗎

By Puput
at 2012-07-21T06:13

樓上的專業的用聞的就聞的出來

By Caroline
at 2012-07-25T05:39

笑了

By Agnes
at 2012-07-29T05:05

厲害

By Rae
at 2012-08-02T04:31

0.0

By Doris
at 2012-08-06T03:57

謝謝你~9527

By Linda
at 2012-08-10T03:23

好專業的撿骨師！唉，我這個阿宅還沒有去過夜店的說

By Steve
at 2012-08-14T02:49

專業食屍鬼!!

By Yedda
at 2012-08-18T02:15

難道猛哥有四輪?

By Yedda
at 2012-08-22T01:41

多傳個兩招吧~~~

By Kyle
at 2012-08-26T01:07

推食屍鬼!!!

By Elvira
at 2012-08-30T00:32

處女會上夜店!!!我也要去!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By Dora
at 2012-09-02T23:58

死亡騎士!

By Daph Bay
at 2012-09-06T23:24

這麼髒就幹砲都不會細菌感染喔神人不知是嘴砲還是命濺

By Victoria
at 2012-09-10T22:50

就像打怪一樣，有祕技XDXD

By Jack
at 2012-09-14T22:16

感謝原PO，小弟獲益良多

By Charlie
at 2012-09-18T21:42

專業推

By Oscar
at 2012-09-22T21:08

有禽有液專業西斯人

By Necoo
at 2012-09-26T20:34

屠龍撿骨師!!

By Kyle
at 2012-09-30T20:00

By Oscar
at 2012-10-04T19:26

原po左撇子

By Quanna
at 2012-10-08T18:51

By George
at 2012-10-12T18:17

讓我想到金針菇

By Ida
at 2012-10-16T17:43

推

By Necoo
at 2012-10-20T17:09

撿骨哥

By David
at 2012-10-24T16:35

專業撿骨哥

By Brianna
at 2012-10-28T16:01

為什麼這種道德淪喪的文沒人噓還被m起來

By Puput
at 2012-11-01T15:27

...

By Sierra Rose
at 2012-11-05T14:53

比照ChinaTaiwan的噓法

By Iris
at 2012-11-09T14:19

因果循環，善惡終有報

By Christine
at 2012-11-13T13:45

小心撿到性病屍體

By Yedda
at 2012-11-17T13:10

今日毀人清白者，當心他日鬼來尋仇

By Iris
at 2012-11-21T12:36

今日夜店淫人妻女者，當心日後其妻女也是夜店鬼混被人淫

By Hedwig
at 2012-11-25T12:02

小心黑道找上門

By Caroline
at 2012-11-29T11:28

屍體撿多了總有一天被告性侵去坐牢

By Isabella
at 2012-12-03T10:54

屍體撿多了總有一天撿到黑道的女人

By Bethany
at 2012-12-07T10:20

屍體撿多了遲早得AIDS沒藥醫

By Agatha
at 2012-12-11T09:46

板大,這種教人鼓勵人撿屍體的道德倫喪文不應該被m吧

By Jacob
at 2012-12-15T09:12

小心記者又來取材爆料了

By Delia
at 2012-12-19T08:38

屍體撿多了遲早得梅毒

By Agatha
at 2012-12-23T08:04

屍體撿多了小心得淋病

By Jake
at 2012-12-27T07:29

屍體撿多了小心得菜花

By Carol
at 2012-12-31T06:55

屍體撿多了小心得皰疹

By Oliver
at 2013-01-04T06:21

...

By Hedwig
at 2013-01-08T05:47

噓得有點累,先去吃飯,道德淪喪的文章就算被桶也要一直噓

By Edwina
at 2013-01-12T05:13

...

By Quintina
at 2013-01-16T04:39

...

By Oscar
at 2013-01-20T04:05

...

By Ina
at 2013-01-24T03:31

...

By Kelly
at 2013-01-28T02:57

...

By Lydia
at 2013-02-01T02:23

...

By Jacky
at 2013-02-05T01:48

...

By Jacob
at 2013-02-09T01:14

...

By Franklin
at 2013-02-13T00:40

...

By Lydia
at 2013-02-17T00:06

...

By Sarah
at 2013-02-20T23:32

...

By Liam
at 2013-02-24T22:58

...

By Suhail Hany
at 2013-02-28T22:24

幫補血推專業撿骨師

By Robert
at 2013-03-04T21:50

...

By Lily
at 2013-03-08T21:16

icerain,我想你才有切身之痛吧,才會在這發這種文誤導人家

By Suhail Hany
at 2013-03-12T20:42

然後好心提醒你可能會得性病你也不知悔改,我想你是自作孽

By Isla
at 2013-03-16T20:07

...

By Queena
at 2013-03-20T19:33

或者可能icerain覺得被人說是"專業撿骨師"很光榮吧

By Heather
at 2013-03-24T18:59

充其量只不過是個管不住小頭的傢伙罷了

By Ivy
at 2013-03-28T18:25

撿屍體這種事還可以拿來炫耀誤導大眾

By Genevieve
at 2013-04-01T17:51

補血，我現在躍躍欲試

By Olive
at 2013-04-05T17:17

真是可笑

By Tom
at 2013-04-09T16:43

又可悲

By Ula
at 2013-04-13T16:09

...

By Sierra Rose
at 2013-04-17T15:35

...

By Bennie
at 2013-04-21T15:01

有人說想躍躍欲試的去增加自己得性病的機會

By Rae
at 2013-04-25T14:26

這種人我管不著,我只救那些還有點良心的人

By Irma
at 2013-04-29T13:52

...

By Genevieve
at 2013-05-03T13:18

...

By Quintina
at 2013-05-07T12:44

...

By Lauren
at 2013-05-11T12:10

...

By Madame
at 2013-05-15T11:36

...

By Erin
at 2013-05-19T11:02

...

By Joseph
at 2013-05-23T10:28

其實,想招攬夜店客人的可以不用來這發這種文了

By Rosalind
at 2013-05-27T09:54

...

By Anonymous
at 2013-05-31T09:20

...

By Audriana
at 2013-06-04T08:45

...

By Franklin
at 2013-06-08T08:11

...

By Brianna
at 2013-06-12T07:37

...

By Skylar DavisLinda
at 2013-06-16T07:03

...

By Eden
at 2013-06-20T06:29

可以努力噓這麼多次也不容易

By Christine
at 2013-06-24T05:55

這麼有正義感全PTT還有很多文章值得噓怎麼就偏偏

By Una
at 2013-06-28T05:21

謝謝樓上的鼓勵,不過你也是,提醒您撿屍體小心得性病碰到鬼

By Adele
at 2013-07-02T04:47

獨衷西斯版呢就算不承認有切身之痛也是種強迫症潛質
我壓根沒說我要去撿啊腦補會不會太超過啊

By Queena
at 2013-07-06T04:13

為什麼說會碰到鬼?

By Ethan
at 2013-07-10T03:39

昨天看4x推今天看剩5推我還以為有低調勒XD

By Kyle
at 2013-07-14T03:04

我現在就覺得碰到鬼了啊腦補功能點滿超自以為的討厭鬼

By Anthony
at 2013-07-18T02:30

因為女的萬一想不開跑去自殺,那你們這群撿骨師就會碰到真鬼

By Dora
at 2013-07-22T01:56

第二種鬼是比喻,萬一那女的是凶神惡煞罩的

By Megan
at 2013-07-26T01:22

那黑道惡鬼找上門你們這些撿屍體的也完了

By Gary
at 2013-07-30T00:48

哦那請問檢屍體甘我屁事老子看看文章不行啊

By Rosalind
at 2013-08-03T00:14

正義魔人咧 PTT還有很多文章需要你開示趕快去解救眾生

By Quintina
at 2013-08-06T23:40

呵呵,誰搭腔我就說誰啊

By Catherine
at 2013-08-10T23:06

還是說你覺得看文章/推文就等於有去撿屍體

By Agatha
at 2013-08-14T22:32

不用講的這麼打太極特別寫謝謝鼓勵然後劈頭就接你也是

By Callum
at 2013-08-18T21:58

後面還想硬凹成好像沒有特別指名對象也轉太硬了吧

By Annie
at 2013-08-22T21:23

好像有人被我說中了,惱羞成怒? 好好笑

By Edward Lewis
at 2013-08-26T20:49

...

By Hedy
at 2013-08-30T20:15

你根本就指名我啊我還有點懶的被你點中呢
看來你除了記憶力跟邏輯能力語言能力也很有問題

By Rebecca
at 2013-09-03T19:41

還自以為說中什麼活在自己的小世界裡面

By Carol
at 2013-09-07T19:07

撿屍體真的是喪心病狂的事,而且還有得性病的危險

By Agnes
at 2013-09-11T18:33

喔好啊所以跟我有什麼關係

By Valerie
at 2013-09-15T17:59

這篇推文再下去很可能會被砍，M大別合了某人的意阿!!

By Kelly
at 2013-09-19T17:25

試想如果有一天你的妻女或女朋友是那個被人撿的屍體

By Ingrid
at 2013-09-23T16:51

那是令人多痛徹心扉的事

By Donna
at 2013-09-27T16:17

...

By Robert
at 2013-10-01T15:42

問題就出在我沒有笨到會讓身邊出現這樣的女人你繼續在

By Carol
at 2013-10-05T15:08

你腦補的小世界打轉吧大概只有這樣你才會安心慢慢玩

By Isla
at 2013-10-09T14:34

希望大家可以潔身自愛

By Jessica
at 2013-10-13T14:00

不要去撿屍體,讓自己成為得愛滋的高危險群

By Quanna
at 2013-10-17T13:26

...

By Jacky
at 2013-10-21T12:52

...

By Kama
at 2013-10-25T12:18

By Rosalind
at 2013-10-29T11:44

By Linda
at 2013-11-02T11:10

最後magicagar實在是誤會我了,小弟只是看magicagar用推文

By Cara
at 2013-11-06T10:36

怕他被這文章誤導跑去撿屍體,應該寫清楚一點

By Eden
at 2013-11-10T10:01

應該寫,你也是要注意啊,不要被這文章騙,跑去撿屍體小心會得
病或碰到壞人又害了那些女生

By Jessica
at 2013-11-14T09:27

...

By Caroline
at 2013-11-18T08:53

handsomeKim, 這篇文真的應該被砍,這種鼓勵人教人去撿屍體

By Xanthe
at 2013-11-22T08:19

的文章,怎麼能在有很多不懂事學生的西斯板出現呢?
萬一記者一報,西斯板又要出事了

By Kama
at 2013-11-26T07:45

By Queena
at 2013-11-30T07:11

9 收工

By Eartha
at 2013-12-04T06:37

從早上噓到下午.... 樓上也太辛苦了

By Daph Bay
at 2013-12-08T06:03

嗯沒必要噓吧西施版不是

By Dora
at 2013-12-12T05:29

就不知道在想啥 XD

By Elizabeth
at 2013-12-16T04:55

哈哈怎麼不繼續? 快點啊等你耶我想等你噓個一千次

By Jack
at 2013-12-20T04:20

然後來朝聖一下

By Olive
at 2013-12-24T03:46

朝聖啦

By Kama
at 2013-12-28T03:12

專業給推XD

By Victoria
at 2014-01-01T02:38

真是辛苦了XD

By Ina
at 2014-01-05T02:04

犰繼續撿

By Catherine
at 2014-01-09T01:30

看舊文順便推回來~

By Noah
at 2014-01-13T00:56

朝聖

By Ida
at 2014-01-17T00:22

朝聖= = 不要檢屍體唷>.^ 雖然說我覺得去夜店就是ONS

By Dorothy
at 2014-01-20T23:48

有啥好噓的

夜店真的是可以撿的到屍體 - 成人話題討論

All Comments

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