叫小姐 - 成人話題討論

Ida avatar
By Ida
at 2015-09-16T23:55

Table of Contents



在下一名小小魯宅兼任噁宅肥宅臭宅工具宅電腦宅動漫宅



一個人旅行到他鄉



天色晚了



隨便挑了間旅館就住



洗了個澡換了套衣服



房間電話淡然響起



小生接起電話



電話那頭傳來了年輕櫃檯小姐的聲音



"喂~這裡是櫃台~請問是30678號房王先生嗎"

"在下正是"

"我們有額外提供外送服務~有需要幫您叫小姐嗎?"

"在下正好龜頭些許微癢"

"請問先生喜歡什麼樣的小姐呢"


這問題在我腦中打轉了很久


身為一個阿宅


想當然一生中的夢想就是要跟初音打上一炮


"你們有類似初音的咖嗎"

"蛤?" 櫃檯那頭傳來疑問

"初音..就是....那個拿著蔥的少女..初音未來..MikuMiku..那個虛擬人物..."

"有的有的!王先生我們這裡應有盡有..馬上為您送上"



太爽啦


我可以跟初音打炮了


五分鐘後房門鈴響起


我帶著淫笑的臉


打開了門


欣喜若狂的打量門外女子









賽你老木的我是要蔥少女

不是菜市場賣蔥的阿桑啊



"少年欸,還不請我進房喔"


這阿桑不知道在兇啥


但我懂得敬老尊賢


把她請進房內


阿桑就這樣提著三把蔥脫光光躺在我床上


我 : 阿桑啊 你拿三把蔥來幹嘛


初音阿桑 : 這三把50啦 哩想要買某? 這金欸就俗欸


也犯不著把早上沒賣完的帶來賣吧


我默默的丟了50元給阿桑


畢竟在下龜頭些許癢


雖然她有點年紀


但畢竟有洞60分是我的座右銘


開始跟阿桑大戰


那畫面就別說多誇張了


阿桑用她人生活了幾十年的風風雨雨經歷


讓我下面爽到不行


視覺上不爽到不行


交戰完後阿桑離開房


留下我與三把蔥獨自在房間


我馬上打給櫃檯



我 : 馬的我要蔥少女你們送來那什麼咖小阿,雖然很爽


櫃台 : 抱歉抱歉 因為太臨時了只好找我媽.....


我 : 啥那是你媽?


櫃台 : 不是不是.. 那是我媽的三舅的兒子的老婆的朋友的舅媽的老師的.....


我 : 我不想聽那麼多廢話,我要在幹一名初音


櫃台 : 沒問題!


十五分鐘後


房門鈴響起


我前去開門


這次我藏起淫笑的臉


欣喜若狂的開門


門一開


這還真是不得了


剛剛那個阿桑居然染了綠頭髮


又順便帶了3把蔥來


我 : 我說阿桑啊...不是拿了蔥染綠髮就可以當初音的


沒想到那阿桑當場開始唱起甩蔥歌


啊啊啊我硬了


沒想到這次是有備而來


i 服了 u


沒辦法我一樣把阿桑帶進房間


跟阿桑天人交戰


阿桑用她跟她老公 做人 的道理及畢生所學都讓我吸收了


完事後房裡留著我與六把蔥





進入聖人模式的我心裡越想越不爽


我居然督了同個阿桑兩次


還射了


還花了100元買了六把蔥




我拿起手機


打給我的在地好朋友阿翔


我 : 靠杯欸在地的幫我叫妹啦,我剛督了兩次同樣的阿桑,超不爽又超爽


翔 : 那有甚麼問題..你要啥類型的


我 : 隨便啦是妹就可以了,我在xx旅館30678號房


翔 : 好!馬上幫你call一個


這下我可放心了


阿翔在地的


叫雞次數比我看過的av女優還多


過了半小時


房間電話響起


櫃台 : 喂王先生嗎有訪客哦


我 : 請她上來


我馬上打開門


期待是怎樣的女孩走來


樓梯轉角間


我看見了個小巧的身型


髮色帶綠


緩緩的走向我


手裡還拿把蔥


喔不,是三把蔥


邊走邊唱著甩蔥歌


在房門前


我倆深情對看


大眼瞪小眼


馬眼瞪屁眼



"馬的怎麼又是這個初音阿桑"












"記住您的需求,是我們的榮幸。"



--
Tags: 成人

All Comments

Joseph avatar
By Joseph
at 2015-09-18T14:40
XD 和運租__
Heather avatar
By Heather
at 2015-09-20T05:24
XDDDDD
Zenobia avatar
By Zenobia
at 2015-09-21T20:08
簡潔有力從頭笑到尾超歡樂氣氛
Caroline avatar
By Caroline
at 2015-09-23T10:52
推個
Una avatar
By Una
at 2015-09-25T01:37
要決鬥嗎
Ursula avatar
By Ursula
at 2015-09-26T16:21
XD
Connor avatar
By Connor
at 2015-09-28T07:05
廢到笑......
Blanche avatar
By Blanche
at 2015-09-29T21:49
阿桑是你
James avatar
By James
at 2015-10-01T12:34
好吃好吃配蔥吃
Poppy avatar
By Poppy
at 2015-10-03T03:18
阿桑配蔥好吃到要吃三遍!
Agatha avatar
By Agatha
at 2015-10-04T18:02
XDDD繞了一大圈只有蔥變多XD
Isla avatar
By Isla
at 2015-10-06T08:46
笑死我XDDDD
Kelly avatar
By Kelly
at 2015-10-07T23:30
可惡,我笑了...機車...
Audriana avatar
By Audriana
at 2015-10-09T14:15
廢到笑……真是西施廢文精華篇
Joseph avatar
By Joseph
at 2015-10-11T04:59
笑到崩潰 是我笑點太低嗎?
Catherine avatar
By Catherine
at 2015-10-12T19:43
Valerie avatar
By Valerie
at 2015-10-14T10:27
你贏了
Mason avatar
By Mason
at 2015-10-16T01:12
幹XDDDD
Jessica avatar
By Jessica
at 2015-10-17T15:56
我不爭氣的笑了
Dinah avatar
By Dinah
at 2015-10-19T06:40
Yuri avatar
By Yuri
at 2015-10-20T21:24
還有蔥可以拿...不小心笑了
Harry avatar
By Harry
at 2015-10-22T12:09
又是阿桑
Brianna avatar
By Brianna
at 2015-10-24T02:53
腳踏車呢?
Ophelia avatar
By Ophelia
at 2015-10-25T17:37
有笑有推
Jacob avatar
By Jacob
at 2015-10-27T08:21
...
Iris avatar
By Iris
at 2015-10-28T23:06
到底要吃幾天蔥啦幹~
Harry avatar
By Harry
at 2015-10-30T13:50
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈30678
Dora avatar
By Dora
at 2015-11-01T04:34
西斯活了~~哈哈
Tristan Cohan avatar
By Tristan Cohan
at 2015-11-02T19:18
有笑有推XDD
Margaret avatar
By Margaret
at 2015-11-04T10:02
不錯
Tristan Cohan avatar
By Tristan Cohan
at 2015-11-06T00:47
smile
Victoria avatar
By Victoria
at 2015-11-07T15:31
XDDD
Jake avatar
By Jake
at 2015-11-09T06:15
笑到不行 算你淫了 XDD~
Hedy avatar
By Hedy
at 2015-11-10T20:59
ya baba,bali bali…
Dora avatar
By Dora
at 2015-11-12T11:44
XDDDDDDD
Michael avatar
By Michael
at 2015-11-14T02:28
記得您的需求是我們的責任
Necoo avatar
By Necoo
at 2015-11-15T17:12
最後一句有好笑到
Jack avatar
By Jack
at 2015-11-17T07:56
幹畢生所學那段好煩哦哈哈哈哈
Michael avatar
By Michael
at 2015-11-18T22:41
督進去的時候不會覺得辣辣的嗎XDDD
Joe avatar
By Joe
at 2015-11-20T13:25
覺得煩XDDDDD
Dorothy avatar
By Dorothy
at 2015-11-22T04:09
有笑有推
Gary avatar
By Gary
at 2015-11-23T18:53
三洨...
Ula avatar
By Ula
at 2015-11-25T09:37
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈
Skylar DavisLinda avatar
By Skylar DavisLinda
at 2015-11-27T00:22
笑了給推
Oscar avatar
By Oscar
at 2015-11-28T15:06
啊拉擦擦拉逼哩吧哩滴
Rae avatar
By Rae
at 2015-11-30T05:50
西斯就是需要這種廢文
Tracy avatar
By Tracy
at 2015-12-01T20:34
費文是你
Hedy avatar
By Hedy
at 2015-12-03T11:19
有夠廢
Eden avatar
By Eden
at 2015-12-05T02:03
阿桑的蔥v.s阿嬤的牛肉麵
Belly avatar
By Belly
at 2015-12-06T16:47
廢到笑
Charlotte avatar
By Charlotte
at 2015-12-08T07:31
有笑有推
Ethan avatar
By Ethan
at 2015-12-09T22:16
廢到笑XDDD
Connor avatar
By Connor
at 2015-12-11T13:00
乾笑了XD
Olive avatar
By Olive
at 2015-12-13T03:44
有吃又有玩 讚
Joe avatar
By Joe
at 2015-12-14T18:28
廢到哭
Rosalind avatar
By Rosalind
at 2015-12-16T09:13
笑死…
Lily avatar
By Lily
at 2015-12-17T23:57
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈怎麼可以這麼靠北
Agnes avatar
By Agnes
at 2015-12-19T14:41
舞告齁糗
Frederica avatar
By Frederica
at 2015-12-21T05:25
哈哈哈哈 超白爛 XD
Edward Lewis avatar
By Edward Lewis
at 2015-12-22T20:09
真的廢到笑出來.....
Ingrid avatar
By Ingrid
at 2015-12-24T10:54
最後超好笑的啦。哈哈哈哈
Olivia avatar
By Olivia
at 2015-12-26T01:38
靠北喔XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Kyle avatar
By Kyle
at 2015-12-27T16:22
欸唉唷不錯這個屌
Liam avatar
By Liam
at 2015-12-29T07:06
瓦哥齁
Vanessa avatar
By Vanessa
at 2015-12-30T21:51
從頭笑到尾XDDD
Poppy avatar
By Poppy
at 2016-01-01T12:35
有笑有推
Isabella avatar
By Isabella
at 2016-01-03T03:19
太北七啦
Isla avatar
By Isla
at 2016-01-04T18:03
換你賣蔥拉
Bethany avatar
By Bethany
at 2016-01-06T08:48
靠 我有笑XDDD
Oliver avatar
By Oliver
at 2016-01-07T23:32
是一個''叫你阿嬤來囉~''的概念
Ivy avatar
By Ivy
at 2016-01-09T14:16
幹嘴角失守XDDDDDDDDDD
John avatar
By John
at 2016-01-11T05:00
就決定是你了 大蔥鴨
Isla avatar
By Isla
at 2016-01-12T19:44
==========================================爽舒暢!
Xanthe avatar
By Xanthe
at 2016-01-14T10:29
廢到笑了
Genevieve avatar
By Genevieve
at 2016-01-16T01:13
XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Thomas avatar
By Thomas
at 2016-01-17T15:57
幹有笑有推
Lily avatar
By Lily
at 2016-01-19T06:41
靠北喔XDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Rosalind avatar
By Rosalind
at 2016-01-20T21:26
靠拜喔!!!!超煩的XD
Sierra Rose avatar
By Sierra Rose
at 2016-01-22T12:10
好廢
Tristan Cohan avatar
By Tristan Cohan
at 2016-01-24T02:54
XDDDDD靠杯~~太好笑了
Emily avatar
By Emily
at 2016-01-25T17:38
XD
Xanthe avatar
By Xanthe
at 2016-01-27T08:23
瓦力十足
Jake avatar
By Jake
at 2016-01-28T23:07
猜到是同人了 可是 XD
Blanche avatar
By Blanche
at 2016-01-30T13:51
你的瓦力有100萬以上
Andy avatar
By Andy
at 2016-02-01T04:35
真是遺憾。
Madame avatar
By Madame
at 2016-02-02T19:20
媽的真夠廢!
Tom avatar
By Tom
at 2016-02-04T10:04
u win
Skylar Davis avatar
By Skylar Davis
at 2016-02-06T00:48
好廢XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Blanche avatar
By Blanche
at 2016-02-07T15:32
有笑有推
Yuri avatar
By Yuri
at 2016-02-09T06:16
超廢XDDDDD
Carol avatar
By Carol
at 2016-02-10T21:01
靠北我竟然笑了…
Yuri avatar
By Yuri
at 2016-02-12T11:45
廢到有剩哈哈哈
Necoo avatar
By Necoo
at 2016-02-14T02:29
XDDD
James avatar
By James
at 2016-02-15T17:13
哈哈哈哈
Olga avatar
By Olga
at 2016-02-17T07:58
XDDDDDDDDDD
Zenobia avatar
By Zenobia
at 2016-02-18T22:42
wwwww
Megan avatar
By Megan
at 2016-02-20T13:26
太廢太好笑了,推一下
Jessica avatar
By Jessica
at 2016-02-22T04:10
推個
Hardy avatar
By Hardy
at 2016-02-23T18:55
夠廢推個!!xD
Agatha avatar
By Agatha
at 2016-02-25T09:39
最後結尾 給力阿
Joseph avatar
By Joseph
at 2016-02-27T00:23
羨慕推
Delia avatar
By Delia
at 2016-02-28T15:07
靠杯哈哈哈
Bethany avatar
By Bethany
at 2016-03-01T05:51
廢到笑XDDDDDDDD
Gary avatar
By Gary
at 2016-03-02T20:36
XD
Hedy avatar
By Hedy
at 2016-03-04T11:20
你到底讓我看了三小啊啊啊
Hamiltion avatar
By Hamiltion
at 2016-03-06T02:04
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈廢到笑
Belly avatar
By Belly
at 2016-03-07T16:48
原po台語太破給箭頭
Poppy avatar
By Poppy
at 2016-03-09T07:33
XDDDDDDD
John avatar
By John
at 2016-03-10T22:17
太好笑了xD
Carolina Franco avatar
By Carolina Franco
at 2016-03-12T13:01
有笑有推
Zenobia avatar
By Zenobia
at 2016-03-14T03:45
XDDDD
Carol avatar
By Carol
at 2016-03-15T18:30
Liam avatar
By Liam
at 2016-03-17T09:14
笑死了XD
Hedwig avatar
By Hedwig
at 2016-03-18T23:58
比前面ㄧ堆笑話都好笑
Victoria avatar
By Victoria
at 2016-03-20T14:42
靠北哈哈哈哈哈超好笑
Barb Cronin avatar
By Barb Cronin
at 2016-03-22T05:27
靠要 我不爭氣的笑了
Franklin avatar
By Franklin
at 2016-03-23T20:11
有笑 推
Wallis avatar
By Wallis
at 2016-03-25T10:55
有笑有推
Donna avatar
By Donna
at 2016-03-27T01:39
廢到笑給推
Eden avatar
By Eden
at 2016-03-28T16:23
....
Barb Cronin avatar
By Barb Cronin
at 2016-03-30T07:08
先推了
Franklin avatar
By Franklin
at 2016-03-31T21:52
這三小哈哈
Olga avatar
By Olga
at 2016-04-02T12:36
廢到笑 推
Lydia avatar
By Lydia
at 2016-04-04T03:20
哈哈哈哈哈
Isabella avatar
By Isabella
at 2016-04-05T18:05
XDDDD
Kyle avatar
By Kyle
at 2016-04-07T08:49
好笑 推
Caroline avatar
By Caroline
at 2016-04-08T23:33
這話調好像周星馳電影XDD
Robert avatar
By Robert
at 2016-04-10T14:17
窩笑了
Gary avatar
By Gary
at 2016-04-12T05:02
哈哈
Dora avatar
By Dora
at 2016-04-13T19:46
有笑有推
Aaliyah avatar
By Aaliyah
at 2016-04-15T10:30
和運公車XDDD
Andrew avatar
By Andrew
at 2016-04-17T01:14
XDDD
Skylar Davis avatar
By Skylar Davis
at 2016-04-18T15:58
笑到翻
Ethan avatar
By Ethan
at 2016-04-20T06:43
推推
Irma avatar
By Irma
at 2016-04-21T21:27
不爽到不行XDDD

女生穿裙子的心理

Megan avatar
By Megan
at 2015-09-16T23:21
hi 各位30cm Gcup 魯蛇好奇 女生內褲是很神聖的東西 很隱密隱私 怕被看到幹嘛還要穿裙子atat? 例如~ 1.新竹風好大喔~內褲會被看到 趕快遮~嘿! 2.騎機車下面好涼喔~嘻 可是會被看到 夾起來好惹!鰍咪 3.搭電扶梯~後面的宅宅會不會偷看人家?? 厚 死變態 我用包包遮 ㄎㄎ ...

看到Malena Morgan的屁眼會興奮嗎

Daniel avatar
By Daniel
at 2015-09-16T21:56
小魯和大部分板上的鄉民一樣正派 但是最近發現大部分作品都是lesbian系列的Malena Morgan真的是超正的!! 正到看到她的屁眼被玩具捅入也會感到興奮 有鄉民和我一樣有這種反應的嗎 - ...

愛我?不如狠狠的幹死我!

Kumar avatar
By Kumar
at 2015-09-16T20:50
一如既往,在恍惚中下體傳來抽插感,沂萱知道大概快七點了,     多年來這已經像是鬧鐘一樣制約著她,在上方耕耘著她的人,曾     經、是她的客座教授,現在、是她的老闆....無論哪方面。     逐漸清醒過來的過程中,沂萱發出了『嗚~嗚~』的呻吟,身體扭     動著迎合著老闆,果不其然,在蓄意的夾緊陰部 ...

有沒有鄉民能夠用舌頭讓女人高潮嗎?

Michael avatar
By Michael
at 2015-09-16T20:32
基本上 我覺得...舌頭是其次 畢竟 ㄧ般大眾的舌頭是不會比手指靈活 但是鬍渣真的是很要不得啊! 磨擦下去真的是會破皮! 再者就是口腔衛生 細菌容易在口腔和牙尖滋生 而女生下陰部溫暖潮溼 很容易感染啊! 至於西斯點... 沒有西斯點啦! 昨天跟老公打完鋼彈就睡了 地震都沒搖醒啊 ※ 引述《lpbroth ...

放電的內褲

Madame avatar
By Madame
at 2015-09-16T20:06
各位30cm跟E奶好 剛剛在鏡子前試穿新買的內褲 看到自己倒三角的身材跟內褲完美貼合在一起 讓人莫名的有成就感 於是小弟我就突然想到了 女性的內褲有很多種用途(各種意義上 當然也有所謂的情趣內褲 那男士有沒有呢 由於小弟萬年孤單寂寞覺得冷無法以內褲誘惑十指姑娘 所以來這請求鄉民解惑 各位在座男士都穿 四 ...